The Cornell 7: Lowering the Bar for Masculinity

by Sharon Kayne

It’s hard to imagine that anything good has come from all the vitriol expressed online about the Cornell 7, but at least it has brought the issue of rape—and gang rape specifically—to the fore. Nobody likes to talk about the bad things, but if we don’t, they never get addressed.

I’ve known for years that rape is not about sex. It’s about power (and, I suspect, about shame—specifically transferring your deep-seated shame to your victim). But gang rape has another, really disturbing component. Because it’s a group activity, the raping is a way for the men to prove their masculinity to one another. Why anyone would care what a fellow rapist thinks about them is beyond me, but I suppose even criminals have their pride. I mean, if you’re going to do reprehensible things, you can’t be too picky about where you get what little respect you can.

But this whole thing got me thinking about masculinity. Not to mention how really fucked up some people’s definition of it can be. Because if sticking your dick in an incapacitated women is your idea of great masculinity, you have a pathetically low bar. Seriously. I think the only way your bar could get any more pathetic or any lower would be to screw a cadaver while yelling, “Look Ma, no hands!” Other rapists may think that definition of masculinity is the bee’s knees, but again, who wants to be looked up to by a rapist?

One opportunity for men to show true masculinity did arise during this insane event. Sadly, every member of Chi Phi at Cornell failed it spectacularly. When Johnathan Newell, an up-and-coming human trafficker, sent around the “free p***y” message, every bro at the residence had the opportunity for some real heroic action. Simply replying “WTF?” would have been at least something. But no one did that. Nor did anyone try and put a stop to the criminal activity. Nobody even called the police, and you can do that anonymously, for pity’s sake. No, every member of that frat house revealed their true colors that night: they are all cowards. Only cowards rape women and only cowards fail to try and stop it.

While scrolling through all the Cornell 7 posts online, I was reminded of one truly masculine response to a similar situation. That was when, in 2015, two Swedish students, who were riding their bikes across the Stanford campus, witnessed Brock Turner raping an unconscious woman behind a dumpster. Instead of taking the coward’s way out and riding on by, those two men stopped, chased the rapist, tackled him, and held him until police arrived. That, my friends, is what real masculinity looks like. Of course, their cache with rapists everywhere took a nosedive, but again, who gives a crap what rapists think?

Sadly, despite being caught in the act, Brock Turner got a disgustingly light sentence. As with the Cornell 7, the judge brought up the specter of his “promising future.” I’ll tell you exactly what is promised in the futures of men who not only do such despicable things, but get away with them. I can promise you, they will continue to be entitled assholes who believe the rules don’t apply to them. Because, indeed, the rules do not. They will go on to become doctors, lawyers, stockbrokers, and CEOs—and, as the entitled assholes they are, they will continue to abuse women. Except in the future, they’ll have much more power and status. And they might have access to plush, corner offices, instead of having to hide their crimes behind dumpsters.

Of course, they might also turn their “the rules don’t apply to me” attitude toward other crimes. Perhaps they will embezzle from the corporations they run. Perhaps they will enter politics and use their offices to enrich themselves. They may even become president, because being an adjudicated rapist is not the career killer you might expect. One thing is certain, no matter what career path they choose: they will continue to view women as second-class citizens, undeserving of their respect and empathy.

What’s even worse: since these rapists got just a cursory slap on the wrist for their crime, future frat boys will be assured that it’s okay to drug and rape women. Because, even if they get caught, there will be no serious consequences. Not as long as they have the cloak of a “promising future” wrapped around them.

And that, my friends, is why women have been suffering rape since time immemorial. Men, who have put themselves in charge of everything, simply haven’t stopped it.

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