I’d never shared a bed with anyone before, so I didn’t sleep as soundly as usual. But every time I woke up, I was reminded that I was with Quil, so it was worth whatever sleep I missed. It was so hard saying goodbye in the morning. I felt this terrible sense of dread, but I told myself I was just being dramatic. Quil walked me out to Mom’s car. We held each other for a while. Then he kissed me.

 

“I’ll call you as soon as it’s over,” he promised. “Loving you, and knowing that you love me too, has made everything worthwhile. You’ve given my life so much meaning. So much joy. I love you Claire Young.”

 

I felt tears starting to well up, but I didn’t want the last look Quil had of me before he went into battle to be of me crying. I swallowed and willed the tears to stay put. “Loving you, and being loved by you, has given me the most joy I’ve ever experienced. More than I ever expected to feel. I love you, Quil Ateara. And I always will.” We kissed again and then I got in the car and backed up. “Be safe,” I said before I pulled away. He smiled and blew me a kiss. That’s when I started to sob.

 

Mom and Karl were ready to go as soon as I got home. I told Mom I needed a sec, then I went upstairs and changed into some clean clothes. I glanced in the mirror before I left and then noticed the picture of me and Quil taken just a few weeks ago that I’d hung there. I don’t know why, but I took it down and put it in my purse. At least I could have that little bit of him with me today. Then I went downstairs.

 

“Your dad decided to go to work. He’s safe enough there, I think,” Mom said. I nodded. Then the three of us got into the car and Mom headed toward I-101. I’d let Karl have shotgun. I turned around as far as I could in the back seat and looked out the window as La Push disappeared from view. I love you, Quil Ateara. And I always will, I said to myself. Then I faced the front of the car and tried to stem the sudden swell of fear.

 

 

Playing hooky from school and spending the day just hanging out in Port Angeles would have been a blast on any other day. But no matter where we went – what store or the pier or whatever – I couldn’t take the least bit of interest in it. My mind was in the forest with Quil. I couldn’t help but wonder if the vampires had shown up. Or how many there were. Or whether the pack would be ready. Mom could tell I wasn’t really there in Port Angles with her and Karl and a couple of times she actually put her arm around my shoulders as we walked. It was sweet and it meant so much to know that she was there for me.

 

Finally, Karl got us to take him to a video arcade. Mom and I watched from a distance as he shot virtual bullets at computer-generated bad guys.

 

“So, things with you and Quil are pretty serious,” she said out of the blue. I could only nod my reply. The sound of his name had brought tears to my eyes. “And he makes you happy?” I nodded again and was able to respond.

 

“He does, Mom. I don’t know why it took me so long to figure it out. But I want to spend my life with him.”

 

“You know I’m very happy to see the two of you together and I have no doubt you’ll be happy. But please don’t forget that you’re just seventeen-years-old, and there’s no reason to rush into anything.” I didn’t know what to say to that, so I just nodded.

 

“Last year you talked a lot about going to college. Are you still hoping to do that?” I should have known she had an ulterior motive for bringing up my relationship with Quil.

 

“I am,” I said, “and I’m hoping Quil will go with me. He wants to be a doctor. Did you know that?”

 

“He may have mentioned that at some point, but I’m not sure.” She paused as if trying to find the most diplomatic way to say what was on her mind. “Claire, as much as I know you’ll be happy with Quil, I just want to make sure you’re still planning on following whatever path you’ve set for yourself.”

 

“I am, Mom.”

 

“I’m just saying that, as wonderful as motherhood is, it’s something you want to be ready for.”

 

So that’s what this was about! I should have figured.

 

“We’re using protection,” was all I said in response.

 

“Good.”

 

 

After watching Karl play war games for what seemed like forever, we finally left and headed to a restaurant for lunch. After we sat down in the booth, I took the picture of me and Quil out of my purse and looked at it. I love you, Quil Ateara. And I always will, I said to myself again. What would I do if anything happened to him? I realized that what I was feeling must be just a small taste of how Quil felt when I’d been kidnapped. At least I knew where Quil was. And I knew he had others around him who would have his back. Quil not only hadn’t know where I was after I’d been kidnapped but he didn’t even know if I was alive. I had put him through hell because I’d been stupid enough to walk to Mom’s car alone before the game had ended. I promised myself that I’d make it up to him. I just needed to believe that I’d have the chance.

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Read Chapter 13